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How To Break Your Need to Fix Everything

We live in a society that celebrates productivity and perfection. However, the pressure to fix everything and maintain control can be overwhelming. Being in control is often equated with success, and any sign of imperfection is seen as a failure. But what if letting go of the need to fix everything could lead to a more fulfilling and balanced life?

The truth is, constantly striving to fix everything and maintain control is not only exhausting but also unrealistic. Life is messy, unpredictable, and full of surprises, both good and bad. No matter how hard we try, we simply can’t control every aspect of our lives or the world around us. And that’s okay.

How to Break the Need to Fix Everything

So how do we break free from the need to fix everything and have control? It starts with a shift in mindset and a willingness to embrace imperfection. Here are a few strategies to help you let go and find peace in the midst of chaos:

Practice Self-Compassion

Instead of being your own harshest critic, practice self-compassion and kindness towards yourself. Understand that it’s okay to make mistakes and that you’re only human. Treat yourself with the same level of empathy and understanding that you would offer to a friend in need.

Set Realistic Expectations

woman of color smiling at camera near a busy city street

Accept that you can’t do it all, and that’s perfectly fine. Set realistic expectations for yourself and prioritize what truly matters. Focus on the things you can control and let go of the rest. Remember, it’s better to do a few things well than to spread yourself too thin trying to do everything perfectly.

Learn to Delegate

You don’t have to do everything yourself. Learn to delegate tasks and responsibilities to others who are capable and willing to help. Trust in their abilities and allow yourself the freedom to focus on what you do best.

Embrace Uncertainty

Life is full of uncertainties, and trying to control every outcome is a futile effort. Instead of fearing the unknown, learn to embrace it. See uncertainty as an opportunity for growth and adventure rather than a threat to your sense of control.

Practice Mindfulness

Mindfulness is the practice of being present in the moment without judgment. By practicing mindfulness, you can learn to let go of the need to fix everything and simply be with whatever arises. Take time each day to pause, breathe, and connect with the present moment.

Focus on What You Can Control

While there are many things in life that are beyond our control, there are also many things that we can influence. Focus your energy on the things you can control, such as your attitude, actions, and responses to situations. Let go of the need to control external circumstances and instead focus on how you choose to show up in the world.

Seek Support

Letting go of the need to fix everything and have control is a liberating experience that can lead to greater peace, happiness, and fulfillment. By practicing self-compassion, setting realistic expectations, learning to delegate, embracing uncertainty, practicing mindfulness, focusing on what you can control, and seeking support when needed, you can begin to release the grip of perfectionism and embrace the beauty of imperfection. So take a deep breath, let go of the need to control, and trust that everything will unfold as it’s meant to.

Reach out to learn more about anxiety therapy and how it can  help you break this cycle.

Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor at Ammirati Counseling
Terri A. Ammirati, LCPC, has 25+ years of clinical experience. She is a Certified Gottman Therapist and presents Gottman's "The Art and Science of Love" couples workshop.

Terri specializes in empowering clients to strengthen their relationships. She works with all aspects of relational distress and provides solution-focused therapy.
Terri A. Ammirati